QUICK HITS
Does America need another fast-fashion brand? Uniqlo thinks so
Marvel subpoenas Instagram to unmask anonymous creator for movie leaks
Complex announces Aria Hughes as Editor in Chief and Noah Callahan-Bever as Chief Content Officer
Ssense is releasing another ‘anti-bridal bridal’ collection featuring non-traditional wedding styles. So yeah, I guess Vogue was right.
Brand founders are using Substack to recommend products and build followings. People are tired of influencers recommending them stuff on social media, so I guess they thought they’d do it here instead. As
said, “people miss the 2010s era of personal blogs”. Well jokes on us because if Substack has its way it’ll become TikTok, Youtube, and X all rolled up into one.By now you've all heard about the Bumble "don't be celibate" debacle, so I won’t dwell on it. All I’ll say is that this is what happens when a brand leverages "gen z insight" without actually understanding what’s DRIVING it or how people FEEL about it. Right now, if Bumble were a person, it would be Regina George’s mom in Mean Girls (the original!)- desperately clinging to lost youth, saying all the wrong things, and receiving only disdain for its efforts. But as
pointed out, Bumble isn’t some great feminist enterprise that has failed us all—it's a billion dollar tech company! So I shan’t be getting my panties in a twist over this one.Meanwhile, Hinge will stop letting you like new matches if you have too many unanswered chats. I hope my friends start behaving themselves.
Emily Sundberg wrote a fun piece for GQ about why member-only clubs are everywhere right now. It’s New York in 2024, and there are start-up clubs, eating clubs, co working clubs, office clubs that become dance clubs, and old blue blood clubs looking for new life. A combination of post pandemic blues, the desire to network over spa dates and fancy dinners, and ofcourse the exclusivity element means pay-for-play social life is having its day. Makes me wonder what The Wing would look like now if it hadn’t gone the way of The Wing.
Suddenly, there aren’t enough babies, and the economists are alarmed. Fertility is falling almost everywhere- for women across all levels of income, education, and labor-force participation. Sometime soon, the global fertility rate will drop below the replacement rate of 2.2 needed to keep the population constant. In some countries, it already has. Governments are worried that an aging population would put too much pressure on the economy, but ironically, many of the leaders keenest to raise birthrates are most resistant to immigration.
is going fulltime on Deez Links and she’d like you to (kindly) pay up. For the uninitiated, Deez Link’s Hate Read series is a Substack must read. It’s basically canon. This is my favorite because I’m also an astrology hater (sorry not sorry), and you can consider it today’s Substack recommendation.
Companies are nervous about the consumer, and they should be. People are broke, but they keep trying to sell us stuff. Have they no conscience?! On earnings calls, dozens of corporate executives have cited a slowdown in spending to explain why sales are slipping, specifically citing the tightened purses of the “low-income consumer.” Mass-market brands, like fast-food companies, have reported that a lot of customers are pulling back on spending, but less price-sensitive sectors, such as airlines and hospitality, say customers are still booking services at higher price tags. It's “an economy of the haves and have-nots.” And they wonder why no one is popping babies.
Kendall and Kylie Jenner want to be your fave summer duo, because sisters who shill together, stick together! I just love how they tagged their mom in this post. Kris Jenner is a version of Regina George’s mom I can get behind. With her, there’s no confusion.
Women are ditching the sperm bank for Facebook’s free sperm economy. The reasons they are doing so include $$$, a lack of sperm diversity, and a desire for fresh sperm. I refuse to expand on these. But Facebook “known sperm donors” really run the gamut. Take Kyle Gordy, of sperm universe fame, who has helped conceive dozens of children, but hopes to father a 1000. He was recently detained by immigration authorities in Fiji on his way to inseminate multiple women in New Zealand, but you can catch him on 90 Day Fiancé soon. The piece does a good job of explaining why these women chose to go down this route, but I can’t help being freaked out by the idea of those kids having dozens of siblings potentially in the same state, and probably unknown to them.
Vogue’s social team is no longer mom; they are now mother. At least for this one post. Someone in the comments said we need to stop giving editorial interns control. I say, give them more!
Let’s talk about lactation cookies once more. We were excited when Molly Baz revealed her partnership with Swehl, and then incensed when Times Square took the ad down. But then Bloomberg had an interesting take: “Lactation cookies are supposed to increase milk supply, but there’s no evidence that they do. Neither is there evidence to support the many herbal supplements, teas, broths, powders, yeasts, gummies, or tinctures peddled to nursing women. And yet they continue to be popular due to a lack of realistic, science-based information for breastfeeding women.” The claim being that maybe we should be more mad at companies trying to market ‘breastfeeding pseudoscience’ to women in the vulnerable postpartum period.
Now, I think there’s still a conversation to be had about why the ad was taken down. Plus it's a cookie, so pretty low stakes here. But as someone who’s so over brands trying to sell me stuff that’ll supposedly make my life better (but seldom does), I know where the author of that piece is coming from. Still, I’m 25 and have never been pregnant, so this isn’t an area I know much about. Let me know, how do we feel about this?
Nearly 50 Vatican Museums’ employees have launched legal action against the administration of Pope Francis over ‘unfair and poor’ working conditions. The workers, mostly museum attendants, have sent a petition to the Vatican's Governatorato- the body that administers the Vatican City State- denouncing “labour conditions that undermine each worker's dignity and health”. The lawyer representing the group claims that workers who had to stay at home during the Covid-19 pandemic, when the Vatican Museums were forced to close, were now being asked to hand back salaries paid during that period. Unions are not allowed in Vatican City (???), but the workers decided to take action only after “all their demands and requests over years were left unanswered." No comments from the Vatican Museums.
A Skims ad at the top of the daily CNN newsletter is cognitive dissonance.
But I loved the new Skims x WNBA campaign and partnership, although I know not everyone did. I won’t say Skim campaigns are the new Vogue covers, but they sure are something. This also a reminder that Glossier had a partnership with the WNBA before it was “cool”, and we love them for it.
Some start-ups are turning Ozempic into the next Botox, which just shows me that an entire industry is about to get built around this thing.
Alchemy 43, an upscale medspa chain, set up a new GLP-1 program that won’t offer any of the brand-name drugs we know, but rather raw ingredients sourced via compounding pharmacies. Since launching the program last fall, 25% of those who received injections were new to Alchemy 43’s business, which also offers Botox, fillers, and facial treatments.
Other companies like Hims and Hers and Found don’t offer GLP-1 weight loss drugs, but do sell other medications associated with weight loss, some even claiming to contain “nature’s Ozempic”.
Obesity researchers and companies are already developing new treatments to help people maintain weight loss; Equinox and Weight Watchers recently launched programs for this.
I know just knowing about Ozempic can make people anxious (I feel you!), but right now, in millions of fridges across the U.S., there is an Ozempic pen. So I want to talk about it. It's been a long time since anything has impacted culture, technology, and several industries so swiftly, and I think it's going to force us to ask some important questions. Like, was body positivity all a big lie?
I know the girls will love this Gap x Dôen collaboration, but the reason I’m excited is because I haven't seen Lily Aldridge's face for a while. Thirteen-year-old Ochuko living in Lagos was obsessed with Victoria's Secret. I’d watch all their shows on YouTube on repeat and knew everything about the Angels—when their first shows were, when they “got their wings,” when they lost them, who they dated, and who opened the show only eight weeks after giving birth! Surprisingly, this obsession had no impact on my own body image. I didn't know any white people, and for all I knew, that’s what the lot of you looked like. A size zero was like blonde hair or blue eyes. It had nothing to do with me.
Apple News added a new word game to boost News+ subscriptions. Is everyone obsessed with word games or does every company want to be the New York Times?
Tesla—which never buys ads—is buying ads to promote Elon Musk’s record $52 billion pay deal days before a key shareholder vote. An SEC filing revealed that Tesla had paid for advertisements and promoted posts on Google and other platforms, not for Tesla itself, but to ensure shareholder support for Tesla’s move to reincorporate in Texas—and to reinstate Musk’s record pay package from 2018. You know, the $52 billion one that would be the largest pay package any CEO would have received in history. All this while Tesla lays off staff, cancels its internship program, and the EV wars rage on. Priorities. I just hope your board rides for you like Elon’s rides for him.
Apple, Netflix, and Amazon want to change how they pay Hollywood stars. In recent weeks, Apple’s Hollywood studio told its business partners that it will soon begin paying talent based on how a series or movie performs. Puck’s Matthew Belloni did a solid deep dive on Netflix’s “age of austerity” and how a new talent compensation model could shake out for them. Netflix’s current ‘buyout’ model is a favorite in Hollywood because it can lead to astronomically high up-front paydays for top stars- plus the money is immediate and guaranteed, eliminating “execution risk”. The companies say they are doing this in response to what Hollywood wants, but many top producers and talent agents think they are just trying to save money. It is, after all, what they do.
How would you guys feel if I ended these with a book recommendation? I’d take requests too. I read 162 books last year (like I said, no one reads that much to not tell people), so I’d have a rec for everything.
so good. all the focus on Ozempic and alternatives is so nuts to me — but hey that’s 2024 I guess
Yes to all of this but especially the book recs please!❤️